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Job-Seeker (Matchmaker Parody)

Editor by Editor
June 23, 2021
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I declare no rights to the music, simply the horrible lyrics.

G: Well, he is received to get a job someday.
Marcie: Millennials, all the identical.
Dad: He might discover one thing fun–
Mom: And one thing with benefits–
Gramma: And excessive paying–
Stephanie: And out of the house–

Lyrics:
Job-seeker, Job-seeker,
Find me a job,
Weed out the shit,
Corn me a cob.
Job-seeker, Job-seeker,
Feel out the net
and discover me the right job.

Job-seeker, Job-seeker,
I’ll convey the swimsuit.
You discover the deets
For this beastly scoot.
Bring me a job for
I’m longing to be
the envy of Stephanie.

For Merfr,
Make it untaxing.
For Mommer,
Vacation a lots.
For me, effectively,
I gained’t get cranky
if fee was solely in pennies!

Job-seeker, job-seeker,
Scour Indeed,
Glassdoor or Craigslist,
however test the wage.
‘Zona’s not nice
for sleeping in my automotive,
so discover me a job,
so I’ll go far.

Stever, oh Sonner,
Have I received a job for you!
It’s native, effectively paying,
Just 5 hours to commute.
But it’s a pleasant job, job, ja?
You betcha.
I promise you may be completely satisfied,
and even in case you’re not,
There’s extra to life than that—
Don’t ask me what.

Boyriz, I discovered it.
You’re the right worker!
Great pianist, hard-working:
a Church job brilliant and early!
But it’s a pleasant job, job, ja?
You betcha.
There’s a choir and an organist,
Rehearsals late at evening,
however solely on Wednesdays
so that you’re alright.
Did you assume you’d get a gem?
Well Mom’s do the most effective they’ll.
With no expertise, no doctorate, no private connections
Be glad you ɡet a job!

Job-seeker, Job-seeker,
Just know that I’ve
had three interviews this week (fact)
two days after I utilized.
Two have been for faculties
and one music summer season camp
however nothinɡ but; on I’ll tramp.

Dear Peej,
See that I’ll prosper.
Remember,
You have been as soon as similar to me.
It’s not that
I’m anti-work,
it is simply I need good cash!

Job-seeker, Job-seeker,
Send me no duds,
Nothing with children,
Not promoting medication,
Target, development,
or donating blood.

So,
Vacays can wait,
G’s an ingrate,
Donna be damned,
Dad must sand.
So discover me the right job.

Dedicated to Mommer and Merfr

source

Tags: job seeker
Editor

Editor

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